Who is Therapy for?
For a long time now, we have seen counselling as support for those people who are in a dark place. Those who are depressed, have severe anxiety and panic, personality disorders, or are addicted or suicidal. Counselling is seen as something we do when we are at our lowest and can’t cope.
That’s how I saw it too, but since I became a qualified Psychotherapist, I now realise that each and every one of us can benefit from Counselling.
The reason I now realise this is from having years of personal therapy myself.
I dabbled in it before I trained. I saw Hypnotherapists as well as counsellors for short term therapy when I was in my late 20’s and early 30’s because I just felt lost. I was just not happy with my life and I wasn’t sure why. I don’t think I was depressed, I just wasn’t happy, and I had no real reason to be unhappy, I just didn’t know where I was going in life, and how can you expect to reach your destination when you have no idea where you are going?
It was part of my training to pay for ongoing Counselling through the full 3 years of my course, which was definitely more than I needed, so I was glad to stop. However, I have since gone back to it as I have found myself going through a tricky time lately, due to relationship difficulties and bereavement. It can last for a few weeks or a few months. Thats up to you.
What I realise from my own counselling, and counselling others is that we all have times when things don’t make sense to us. When we might need some support. We might experience a life transition, such as retirement, redundancy, or the end of a relationship, or loss of a loved one.
Importantly, counselling isn’t always about talking endlessly, but also about problem solving and awareness. Enabling you to better understand who you are and to realise your strength and strengthen your resilience. It can last a few weeks or a few months, and thats up to you.
What Counselling offers is a relationship like no other. Though it does take a while to build that relationship, it can be so refreshing, liberating and healing to share and explore life and ourselves with a trusted, unbiased other.
Some are lucky enough to have this person in their lives. Someone to share their deepest fears and darkest worries, hopes and dreams, and insecurities, and not fear judgement or criticism. But most of us don’t have that person.
I have realised how important this relationship is. Ok, it may not be not free, but its genuine. There is warmth and understanding, confidentiality and most importantly, no judgement.
Contrary to popular believe, Therapy is not for the weak hearted. It takes a certain amount of courage to face your faults, your weaknesses and to make changes, Most of us hate change, but as Albert Einstein said “If you keep doing the same thing, you will keep getting the same results”, so without committing to making changes you will stay stuck. Embarking on therapy itself is proof that you are ready to look at what’s working in your life and what isn’t, and how to make changes to get the most out of life for yourself and those you love.
Sharing our secrets with a trusted other means we can let it go, it really is a weight lifted, and once it is out, in the room, it can be viewed from a different perspective. To be able to untangle all of those thoughts that have been spinning around for years and to see them for what they really are.
Counselling has allowed me to offload my mind and connect with my heart and to understand what it really means to be understood. To have someone sit by your side, to walk the same path and catch your fall. That’s worth paying for because, for me, that is priceless.